where we are today

i am so thankful for the many friends and family who have been by our side through our infertility journey over the last 42 months. i cannot count the number of people who have said they are praying for a baby chidester for us. we could not be more blessed to be surrounded by such an encouraging and loving community.

42 months later, our journey has landed us here; exactly in the place God wants us to be. john and i have prayed about where God has led us, and feel that He has put our minds at peace about trying IVF. with endometriosis, this is our greatest chance at becoming parents.

i've heard many people tell me over the last few weeks that they are saddened we haven't come to them and told them where we are on this journey, and while i realize that not everyone's worlds revolve around us, i do realize that i need to better update those who pray for us, care about us and most of all, are living with us through this journey that we're on.

so, i have decided to post any pertinent updates here and you can choose to read at your leisure.

although i am about a month or two behind in starting this, here is where we are:

• after two failed IUI procedures in april and may, john and i started the process of IVF after much prayer at the beginning of june
• we've gone through all of the necessary tests (all which turned out to be normal), and received my giant box of medicine in the mail. talk about a fear of needles...
• my first ultrasound date is scheduled for july 2nd. please be praying!

even while i write this i find myself wanting to hold on to it. to hold on for fear of failure, for fear of disappointment, fear of having to tell you all that it didn't work. i've been down those roads so many times and i would be lying if i said i didn't struggle with that. but i've made a promise to the Lord that i wouldn't keep anything in if at least one tiny bit of it was for His glory.

i choose to believe daily that we are here for a reason. if i knew what tomorrow would bring, then there would be no faith. there would be no need for Jesus. i have learned many priceless lessons through this journey of faith, but i think the most important one is my need for Him. i simply cannot do this, or anything else on my own. and frankly, i just don't want to. as hard as it is to jump over a cliff with your eyes closed... oh how great a feeling it is when you land, open your eyes and see the beautiful place you have landed.

thanks for your prayers! much love.

sara